Dan's Scans

Socializing on the Web

By Dan Robinson

 

It’s no secret that I met my wife on the Internet. This wasn’t in a chat room or eHarmony. It was way before these came along in their current guise. It was back in the nineties on a Macintosh Special Interest group on a bulletin board site. Perfectly legitimate and all that rot.

 

Anyhow, she posted a Mac question from Charlotte, NC and I, in L.A., was the only one in the world who knew the answer. (The only one on that bulletin board, anyhow.) To make a long story short, I now live in Charlotte.

 

So it is perhaps with a more sympathetic eye that I look on the surge on social networking. But even if I am sympathetic, I prefer meeting people face to face and never really felt much pressure to participate in the likes of MySpace, Facebook, and Twitter.

 

But in the interests of good journalism, I decided to get a Facebook account and see what happens.

 

I’m confused at what’s happened.

 

They’s peepul comin’ outta the woodwork!

 

The first was a client for whom I did a book three years ago. “Alpha added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to confirm that you know Alpha in order for you to be friends on Facebook.”

 

OK. Sure. Minutes later . . .

 

“Beta added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to confirm that you know Beta in order for you to be friends on Facebook.”

 

OK. Beta is a wannabe writer who at one time was in a group with me on a fan fiction site. I know him.

 

“Delta added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to confirm that you know Delta in order for you to be friends on Facebook.”

 

Now who the heck is this? Oh! a friend of Beta! What the hey! — ‘Approved.’

 

“Gamma added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to confirm that you know Gamma in order for you to be friends on Facebook.” Gamma is a friend of Delta, who is a friend of Beta, who is an acquaintance last heard from in 2003.

 

This is getting out of hand.

 

By the way, Epsilon posted a picture of herself with a rapturous smile, holding up a fantasy novel written by someone else!

 

I hate fantasy. I’m a hard SciFi guy!

 

So what is the protocol? Can I go back and tell Delta, Gamma, Phi, and Epsilon that I don’t want to have them as friends? Will it hurt their wittle feelings?

 

After due consideration, I just turned off email notifications. When I go to Facebook, I’ll see who has asked me to be their friend.

 

Therein lies the problem. If you approve everyone, you’ll have so many friends, friendship itself becomes diluted and of decreased importance. People you don’t know and don’t care about posting things that don’t interest you.

 

Of course if you’re too selective, you won’t have any friends, anyhow.

 

Ah Ha!

 

Mousing around, look what popped up! (Circled on the right) I’ll try that! This way, everybody gets approved, but if they post drivel — which is pretty much everyone on the sample to the right — ZAP! They can post all they want . . . I just won’t have to wade throu