Macs Really Do Run Windows Better

By Steve Frank – Reprinted with permission

http://www.stevenf.com

Ever since Boot Camp appeared on the scene, there have been several comments about Macs being better Windows machines than Windows machines. The weird thing is it's actually true.

I won't lie to you -- I use Windows occasionally. It's important for me as a Mac developer to use Windows once in a while, because it's a fantastic lesson on how do absolutely everything wrong when designing software. (For example, one of my top ten favorite Windows XP features is the one where it asks you to confirm your wireless network password by entering it twice when you join a network.)

The other 90% of the time, I use Windows because it is a popular gaming API. I've maintained a succession of PCs over the years just to play a handful of games that never got ported to the Mac. (I'm looking at you, Half-Life series! B****ds.)

Having just set up XP in Boot Camp again over the weekend, I'm amazed again by how much better the experience is than using a Windows box built by an actual Windows box vendor.

You just install Windows from a retail disc, install the Boot Camp drivers from a second disc, let Windows Update reboot about 20 times, and you're set. The resulting system is really fast and all the hardware works.

By way of comparison, let's discuss my most recent PC, which happened to be a Sony VAIO. If you've not dealt with Windows box vendors lately, you are really missing out on some treats.

For starters, Windows vendors have discovered that they can save upwards of 1/1000th of a cent per unit by NOT INCLUDING RESTORE DISCS with the computer. What they do now is install the OS, and a hidden partition (6-10 GB or so) containing the restore data. Then there's usually some program you can run that lets you burn a restore disc your damn self if you want to.

Or better still, you can forget to do that and be completely screwed when your hard drive fails out-of-warranty. It's also important to note that this particular PC did not offer any disc burning hardware -- I had to rustle up an external USB disc burner... to get system restore discs. I could also order them from Sony for TWENTY DOLLARS.

Finally, a sheet of paper came with the PC advising me to use an i.Link burner, rather than a USB burner, otherwise "compatibility problems" could result. (i.Link being what the entire rest of the world calls "FireWire".) What in the hell is that supposed to mean? The only "compatibility problem" I can think of is the compatibility of my wallet with Sony's web site, which sells i.Link disc burners.

The VAIO came loaded with so much shovelware that it took in the ballpark of fifteen minutes just to boot the first time. After the desktop came up, the disk just kept grinding and grinding and grinding, as Norton (60 day trial!) popped up, followed by Trend Micro Anti-Spyware (60 day trial!), a dialog box warning me that my Bluetooth module was not set discoverable (uh, thanks?), a cascade of Sony windows (for which they designed their own window style), the Ask! Toolbar conveniently pre-installed itself into Internet Explorer, some bubbles asking me to set up such-and-such piece of hardware, and, I'm not kidding, an "All Programs" menu in the Start Menu that spanned three columns.

I hope Sony doesn't seriously believe that any of this is helpful to anyone, and that it simply makes them look like giant corporate whores to any company that will wave a dollar under their nose. It's such a total mystery why Apple doesn't participate in the Intel Inside sticker program!

So, I headed straight for the "Remove Programs" control panel, as always, to be confronted by a 2-3 page list of complete crap. (Ooh! Trial versions of Wheel of Fortune AND Jeopardy!?) Then I thought, you know, it would be easier just to clean re-install Windows, then the Sony drivers, and call it a day.

Ho ho ho.

The VAIO came with a Windows Certificate of Authenticity, including the license key, so I figured I'd just boot off the retail disc I had lying around, and use that license key. How naive.

Let me stress this point: The retail boxed version of Windows WOULD NOT ACCEPT the license key from the CERTIFICATE OF AUTHENTICITY that was INCLUDED IN THE BOX WITH MY PC. The recovery discs are the only way to get the OS back onto the PC without burning an unnecessary second Windows license.

And, of course, you don't find out about this restriction until you already have Windows half-installed. And, double of course, the recovery discs put Wheel of Fortune and everything else right back on as well.

In my desperate quest for a clean system, I went ahead and used the retail license I had, since I wasn't actually using it for anything else at the time, effectively paying for Windows twice. That went fairly smoothly. Now it was time to install the drivers.

Let me just take a break here to pop a few Valium before I talk about Sony's driver download site.

There we go. Ahhh. Sweet medication eases the pain.

Finding Sony's driver site, and the correct page for my computer on that site was relatively painless. It would be the last painless moment of the process.

I suddenly found myself looking at a list of 40-50 individual installers. And of course, you can't just click to download them -- clicking on one of them takes you to the DOWNLOAD page, where you click AGAIN to download them. For every... single... one.

But wait, what's this! "Download Taxi"! Clever old Sony has come up with a download client to spare me this pain. I just install the Download Taxi client, then I can select all the updates with one click, and choose "Download with Download Taxi"! Brilliant! This will save me so much t--

Wait, what is this tiny footnote at the bottom of the page?

* Download Taxi Limitation: Maximum of 35 files per download

Picking my head up off the desk, I decide not to bother with Download Taxi, and begin the process of clicking 100 links to download all the driver installers.

A note about the installers themselves: They are most all the various hardware vendors' original driver installers, wrapped within ANOTHER installer by Sony for no apparent reason other than exclusively to piss me off. In addition, every single one of them is named in this format: SOAVUD-01451706-US.EXE

Yeah, so that number has nothing to do with anything. It's not a version number, it's not a date, it's literally just 8 apparently random numbers. You give Windows users a 255 character filename limit and this is what they do?

I'm clicking away through the installers, trying to remember whether I just installed 01256339 or 12847214, so I don't accidentally delete one I haven't installed yet. And then the problems kick in. A couple of the installers just quit at the end, without any indication of either success or failure.

That's nerve-wracking enough, but then one of them straight up tells me "Installation failed", then, after I click OK to that, "Installation successful!"

After weighing the pros and cons of suicide, I decide to actually try to use some of the hardware I just installed drivers for. About 80% of it works. Some of it, just a dead loss; doesn't work at all. I don't know what I could have possibly done differently with all those installers.

Finally, I give up. I just throw in the towel. I reinstall from my homemade recovery discs, Wheel of Fortune and all. There's one final insult, which is that Sony has scattered the installers across two DVDs so that the restore process requires manual intervention in the form of 5 or 6 disc swaps, not at all unlike trying to copy a floppy disk 20 years ago.

Then I go back to Remove Programs, and start tossing out junk. There are at least three programs in the list (Microsoft Business Contact Manager for Microsoft Outlook for Business for Microsoft for Contacts for Microsoft, and not one but TWO entries for Flash Player 8) whose uninstallers can't be located when I try to uninstall them. Don't care any more. I'll just uninstall as much as it will let me and live with it.

Literally hours of pain later, and I have a VAIO with working drivers that is mostly s***-free.

It's a good thing Half-Life 2 was really, really awesome.

XP on my Mac though? Smooth sailing. *smacks lips* Is that the delicious taste of irony? I think it is!

For comments, go here - http://stevenf.com/2007/09/macs_really_do_run_windows_better.php